Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Out of this World

Looking at the clouds on Friday afternoon, being completely still and just BEing, so many missing pieces of the puzzle came together.

Watching with wide open eyes as the clouds come together and separate - in random formation and yet not, it comes to me that we are not the only sentient beings on our Planet.  

These amazing lush clouds, enchanting me with their patterns - reminding me of deep stored secrets within my soul.   And as I sink in to the earth and become one with the sand, more is revealed to me by these ethereal floating masses that come together and move apart so gracefully, as if they are dancing for my bemusement.

And then I hear the whispers, the stories the clouds are ready to share - Can you see me?  one asks.  Can you feel what I am trying to convey?  And I watch in wonder and awe - feeling my heart swell open as I connect with life beyond this level - spirits who come together to protect us and watch us and provide shelter.

It is the same with the stars, you know.  To hear their stories, I must be still and quiet and be with them in their time - when the world turns off and peace prevails.

One of the blessings of my new love, Ginger, is that I am up and out the door at 4:44 a.m.   We commune with the stars, Ginger and I, while taking in the smells and the sights and the stillness.  This morning, we talked to Mother Moon, the little sliver of her we could see, as she gets ready to blanket herself in darkness and bring the New Moon period to us.

Life is good!!!  All is well in my world.

Monday, July 28, 2008


For the last couple of months, I was feeling very stuck and stagnant - not writing, not sharing, not flowing well.

The little Peep inside was not forthcoming - actually rebelling - ART - she kept on yelling.

And yet, so many things to do, lists to complete, chores to finish, life to keep up with.

Not allowing myself to play - not making it a priority in my life - so I can have some balance.

"All work and no play....", they say.

Goddess Leslie came over with Dog-God Mandy and we painted rocks.  This, for me, was such a great start - small yet significant - a little bit of paint, some rocks, not a major commitment of time  - or so I thought.  Three hours later, we are still painting rocks and talking - in quiet stillness and yet together.

And the child within was mollified.  And so was I.

Painting seven rocks - allowing  myself expression in color - it's a wonderful thing.  And it seems to unlock the door to feelings and emotions - none which have any words or labels, just images/clouds that go through me - feelings, nothing more than feelings.

It inspired us to plan a re-TREAT.  We committed to a time and place and activities for the PEEPS within and the adults who house them.  We agreed to work together as Sisters & Goddesses to help each other move forward in unconditional love and support.

Tis a beautiful thing!!!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Sunday Scribblings - #121 - SOLACE

"When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom, Let it Be"
- Beatles

For me, music is my solace.
SOLACE - Merriam Webster defines it as alleviation of grief and anxiety. And a source of relief or consolation.

I can always lose myself in music - no matter what mood I am or what I am thinking or feeling - a good melody can get my heart singing and help quiet my mind and take me to another dimension. It's like a meditation. I let the sound enter my ears and vibrate into my cells and fill my bones. I am transported by the sound and sometimes, the words, to a different place and space where peace and stillness are easy to find.

Some of my favorite music has no words. Or if I listen to foreign music, I let the tune and beat transcend the words so I can understand the feelings conveyed.

Mozart relaxes and soothes. Beethoven excites and stimluates. Karen Drucker's music fills me with positive thoughts and affirmations and helps me heal my heart and soul - Deva Premal - helps me focus on being still and connecting with the Divine. Alabina gets my body moving and shaking. And ABBA - well, their music always seems to bring me back to a very happy time in my life.

I have learned to incorporate the music within. And when I need solace, I turn on the music player in my heart and fill up my soul, from the inside out with melodies of love and bliss and peace and joy.

" I have a dream, a song to sing,
To help me cope with anything"
- Abba

Nassau - Bahamas

The second port of call on our cruise was to Nassau, Bahamas.

I started the morning on the ship's gym with windows floor to ceiling overlooking
Nassau. Did some weights and a little yoga. Joined the morning stretch class and then a vigorous spinning class led by a young man from South Africa.

By 9:30 a.m., I was showered & fed and we debarked off the ship and past the vendors in the immigration hall and onto the shopping mecca of Bay Street. Being that we are not big shoppers, we kept on walking until we left the strip and found a little beach and some shade to cop a squat. We sat under a Casuarina tree, a/k/a the Australian Pine Tree, and listened to the delightful sounds of the wind blowing through her pine needles. After a little while, we started walking again, destination seemingly unknown to the mind but familiar to the soul. We passed a lovely park and beach and Fort Charlotte and found ourselves in front of Arawak Cay - a whole bunch of fish fry restaurants and bars.

12 years ago, Arawak Cay was not developed at all. It was a little pitstop on the road full of shacks with tables and chairs and vendors cracki
ng the conch right out of the shell in front of your eyes. We had the bestest conch salad and a concoction called Sky Juice (a mixture of coconut milk and gin). Being that we were here on Sunday, nothing was yet open . So we kept on walking, dreaming of the conch salad and conch fritters we would have for lunch.

It's funny but we haven't been here in 12 years.

In fact, the first and last time we were here was the first trip we ever took together. Noah surprised me for my birthday and booked tickets to the Bahamas. He called my boss and coordinated everything so that he would pick me up at my office early Friday afternoon, suitcases packed and to the airport we would go. The funny thing is that he forgot the tickets at home - so on a Friday afternoon just at the beginning of rush hour, we drove from downtown Miami the 20 miles to Hollywood and then 18 miles back to Miami to the airport. We made it for our flight just in the nick of time - of course, this was before 9/11 and long security lines and taking off your shoes for no purpose. Tee hee!!!

Back then, he had booked us into this romantic hotel called Orange Inn. We ate a lot of conch, an island aphrodisiac, because we were told it made a man stout. We discovered Compass Point
and had a delightful birthday dinner while meeting new friends and listening to a great singer. Back then, we rented a moped to get around the island. This time, we upgraded:

We found Island Scooter Coupe Rental and chose the topless yellow model seen above. For 2 1/2 hours, we scooted around the island, honking and laughing and letting the wind and sun scorch us as we ventured to Cable Beach and beyond and went back in time to the places of long ago.

Revisiting Compass Point and its lovely cottages made me realize how inspired I was by their decor. And how I came home and incorporated their savoir-faire and joie de vivre into the design and color of my home. Being here gave me the freedom to be and paint in wild and fabulous colors and express myself.

This vacation has been so nurturing for my soul. Noah and I really had an opportunity to relax and unwind and have no response-abilities. And play and explore and discover. And revisit the past and observe the changes and growth in Nassau, in ourselves and our relationship.

Right across from Arawak Cay, Noah found a vendor making conch fritters. She dunked her little balls into the oil and four minutes later, we were eating the yummiest conch fritters.

And then we headed back for our cruise, full and satisfied and happy.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

My New Love

We have been a Meow family for 10 years now.

Our first Meow, Blackie, was a gift from Soul Mama. It started out as "can you keep her for two weeks while I am on vacation" that turned into 8 blessed years of Meow Love. She was the first to nuzzle in Noah's armpit and purr hello in my face every morning.

And then we adopted Zeko in 1999 at the Humane Society. He was just a little kitten who came right up to us and Meowed his way into our hearts. The only MALE in our menagerie, he feels a deep kinship with Noah. And Ruby Meow was the runt of a girlfriend's feral cat litter. She found her way into our home in 2000. She is the Goddess Diva Meow in our home. (Picture of Zeko looking at Ruby)

In December 2005, Blackie unexpectedly passed away. Not being able to find anything medically wrong with her, we brought her home from the vet and let her die with dignity. She stopped eating one day and drinking the next and three days later, her soul left. We buried her under a tree outside. She taught me how to deal with death and be grateful for all the wonderful moments in my life and all the blessings that the Universe constantly showers upon me.

Elly Belly came to fill the void of Blackie's departure and balance our family. Brother Gilabong brought her to us after he saw how much love we had for our Little furry Peeps. She is quite a talker and a belly sleeper.

Three weeks ago, Ruby Meow had a breathing attack. I rushed her over to the vet where she was treated for an allergy attack and placed in oxygen to help her recover. While in the nebulizer, Dr. Darko's assistant was telling me of the dogs that had arrived from the Humane Society. They were scheduled to be put to sleep when Goddess Cheryl saved their lives. Ginger was suffering from heart worms and was a little underfed and she had just given birth to a litter of pups.

When I first met her, she gave me her paw as a sign of peace. She closed her eyes and leaned her head on my shoulder. I hugged her and fell in love with her scent. I rubbed her paws and the spaces in between her toes. She smelled so good.

Now, Noah had talked about adding a dog to our family. However, he was looking for a puppy.
I came home and plead my case. A week later, we are on the way to the vet to check out Ginger. I get a feeling so I call the vet en route and find out that Ginger has been moved to another shelter (she was actually taken to a PetSmart for an adoption day). And I was so sad. However, I knew if the Universe meant for Ginger and me to be together, we would.

So, I let it go. I gave Noah time to accept and adapt to the fact that we would be a Meow and BowWow family. I gave him breathing space to come into this decision on his own.

Two weeks later, we are on the way to the vet's office to drop off records. The vet's assistant calls me and tells me that Ginger is back. Noah agrees to meet her and sleep on it. And there we are, in the vet's office and Dr. Darko says: Take her home, try her out, see how she gets along with the Meows. We were leaving on Friday for a cruise and I didn't feel right about leaving Ginger in a new environment with the Meows without us. Dr. Darko agreed to pick her up on Friday morning and keep her until we returned on Monday. And Noah said YES to the Universe.

We picked up Ginger on Monday. She was so happy, she jumped into the back seat of the car and looked at us like she was ready to head on home. I know she has experienced a lot in her lifetime that I have yet to know. I feel such a strong bond between us and know that she will share her story and secrets when she feels secure in her new home.

Everytime she hears me and wags her tail, my heart thumps, thumps, thumps to the rhythm of her wagging. And when she puts out her paw to give love, and turns over to get her belly rubbed - I feel a great big love overflowing in my heart.

Ginger is calm and mild. She allows the cats to come sniff her and has stood there patiently and quietly waiting to earn their acceptance and approval. She has not entered the bedroom yet understanding that this is Meow Territory and that they will give her a sign when they are ready.

I look forward to spending the rest of her natural life together merging our Meow Sanctuary into a Doggie Heaven.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Island Living

Saturday on the cruise - We are docked at Coco Cay, an island in the Bahamas owned by Royal Caribbean Cruise Line.

We slept in on Saturday morning- we were up late giddy with excitement after Karaoke and viewing the Full Moon rising from the Ocean. And listening to the ship's anchor being released and sent into the water at 6:00 a.m. (minor disadvantage of having a cabin at the front of the ship).

And when we did rise, the ship has just received clearance and was tendering (using a smaller ferry to get from the ship to the island) its guests to Coco Cay. I had some yummy oatmeal breakfast with apricots and golden raisins and bananas and cranberries. Noah was enamored by the muesli cereal and its accoutrements. We went back to the cabin and packed our towels and camera and headed for the island.

After a 7 minute ferry ride, we were welcomed to Coco Cay. First, there was a straw market with all sorts of souvenirs on sale. And then, chairs set up on the beach and hammocks and a station for renting snorkeling equipment and one for renting jetskis and kayaks. A place for a BBQ lunch. A few bars. We kept on walking past the crowded beaches, fully intent on exploring this island. We found a hammock city - a shaded area full of hammocks swinging in the breeze. Noah parked himself there and proceeded to take a nap.

I went to scope out the island. I walked for about 2 miles and found deserted beaches with beach chairs scattered and hammocks here and there. Not too much shade as it seems that part of this island might have encountered hurricane winds in the previous years. I was walking on the water's edge - clear and shallow waters when I noticed I had a friend. He was hard to see until I stopped and let him swim right up to me. See if you can find him in the waters below (look for a spot).

Noah woke up and we went for a walk and found a private beach spot - just him and me and the little fishies that came to the play in the shallow waters as we lay there and took in the sun and the skies and breathed the fresh air.

Some IN-secure-ities that came up for me today - my hairy legs and wearing my bathing top and shorts and what would people think or say when they saw my legs. It 's been almost two years since I stopped shaving, waxing, pulling my hairs out and just letting my body be like the Universe created me. And here I was, on a ship full of strangers and a ferry full of other souls just looking for their little spot in the sun and all I could think of was who would check out my legs. Tee hee!!! I had to laugh at myself. I thanked this thought for sharing and released it to the nothingness from whence it came. And I allowed myself to have a blast, hairy legs and all!!!

We got back to our cabin, fully kissed by the sun and detoxed from the ocean. We ate a late lunch/early dinner. We sat on the top deck and watched the stars come out and the moon rise. We let the wind caress us as the ship rocked a little to the right, a little to the left. We came back to our room to find a little surprise on the bed. Thank you Goddess Lisonette for taking care of our stateroom and giving us such a great laugh.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Cruising on a Friday afternoon

We did it. We took the plunge - just Noah and me - no cell phones, no computers, no thing to do, no where to go. We booked a three day cruise to the Carribean. A little honeymoon for two.

Friday, at 3:00 p.m., we checked in with Royal Carribean Cruise Lines and boarded the Majesty of the Sea. She set sail at 5:00 p.m. from the Port of Miami for destination Coco Cay (private island owned by RCCL) and Nassau, Bahamas.

We settled into our corner room on the Tween Floor (the 6th floor on this cruise is a half floor between the Shopping 5th floor and the 7th floor). We had an outside cabin with a porthole with a cubby. We skipped early dining and explored the ship instead.

We checked out the pools and the rock climbing wall. And the gym. And the kids' lounge. And the basketball courts. And found a pingpong table. We had a match and met a friend. Noah and Anthony from North Carolina (who happens to be a 8 year old twin) enjoyed a round or two.

So many food options while cruising. Besides the formal dining rooms, a buffet in the Windjammer Lounge, wraps and paninis at the Deli, and a complete Johnny Rockets on the ship, there is also 24 hour room service. We found some wonderful salad options and veggie choices and sat in the lounge watching the sun go down into the ocean. We then caught an entertainment preview show and enjoyed the comedy of Phil Tag. This guy was hysterical.

A little past our bedtime, I convinced Noah to take me to the Compass Lounge for some Karaoke. What a blast!!! I love Karaoke. Singing from the heart and just having fun. Tee hee!!! Enjoy my rendition of Joy to the World.